Oh, whats he gone and done now?

Not good.

Apparently the lipstick-pig quote is an established rural metaphor, but of all the metaphors to choose, this was not the one. Since the RNC, the Democrat ticket has been in all-out-defensive mode, and the two ill-established impromptu speakers have performed as only a red-stater dared hope. I don't believe that Obama is necessarily sexist; rather, he has forgotten Orwell's dictum that common metaphors should be dispensed with. Surely a man as brilliant as The One could have concocted a different, benign metaphor, like "You can put a hat on a cow, but it's still a cow!" But he didn't, and time will tell why. If I had to guess, it's because he's under actual pressure. McCain was supposed to be the fall guy. He would lose, The One would be elected President of the Globe, and the seas would recede, the peoples of the world would beat their swords into ploughshares, and [insert calamity here] would be averted by the power of His will. But McCain decided to fight. And just as the Junior Senator from New York was able to pressure the One into telling remarkable tales of the fifty-seven states and the "bitter Americans who cling to their guns and religion," so now the Republican ticket, coming from the deepest canyons of nowhere, compels the same. We shall see how the Lord Messiah and the Chief Apostle hold up face to face with the two people driving them completely mad.

Guilty As Sin

In The Flat Hat today, it seems that a mere apparent cover-up of a small amount of meaningless graft by the former SA President can be solved by a (thus far non-forthcoming) apology. I of course refer to the scandal now embroiling 404 Jamestown Road involving SA VP Zach Pilchen's THEFT (since he made no intention of paying it back unless he got caught) of $140 of the PEOPLE'S MONEY. (Aside: ALL GOVERNMENT FUNDS ARE THE PEOPLE'S MONEY, whether they were collected as tax (mandatory student fees) or independently raised. The people (students) are the government (SA). Thus any holdings of the government are holdings of the people. End aside) No, in the eyes of the sages at the allegedly non-political FH, mere "reflection" on his fitness will suffice. Wrong answer. The Japanese have a ritual in which disgraced public figures come before the press, deliver a public apology, bow, and resign in shame. This seems appropriate for Mr. Pilchen, who never had confusion with the debit card before April, but then mysteriously managed to give himself at least seven illicit liquidity advances between April and God-knows-when. And then not tell anyone about it. And apparently "misplace" the receipts. Of course, TFH's editors are far more ethically concerned than Pilchen himself, who has (thus far) neither made restitution (source: TFH) nor apologized, preferring to "gauge student response" before coming clean. Shame on him. Shame on us for electing him and Hopkins (who may be innocent of any wrongdoing, BTW) with a 50 per cent margin. But we can't possibly be faulted, since no hardworking Obama supporter could possibly engage in graft that would have made Spiro Agnew (Nixon's VP for the historically illiterate) sure he had a new protege.

FP/YC Ruling:
Straight Red, Life ban.


UPDATE: He resigned effective 1730 9/02. Source: VIO